Massachusetts Senator Ted Kennedy, a noted Washington Liberal and ladykiller has been hospitalized in Boston with “symptoms of a stroke.” Kennedy underwent surgery last year to clear his carotid artery in hopes of preventing exactly this situation. It’s not too much of a stretch to assume that the Senator’s arteries are clogged as a result of his decades of overeating and heavy drinking. Though the hospital is releasing little information, this is probably a serious health scare since the media’s is in full Deathwatch mode, and because Kennedy became ill at his family’s Hyannisport compound this morning and appears to have been airlifted to Boston for treatment rather than being taken to a local hospital. Also, the dude is like 80 years old. Join us in the comments below to trade rumors, wild speculation, and Kennedy memories.

Ted Kennedy rushed to hospital [CNN]

Listen, thanks for stopping by. But seriously, you should probably subscribe to our RSS feed. It'll make you smarter!

NBC Nightly News Anchor Brian Williams has been hospitalized for severe embarrassment, shock and, doctor’s fear, terminal mortification after Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton interrupted him with the interjection, “hold the line, snuggybuns,” during an interview at a campaign whistlestop in Elizabeth, NJ .

Clinton had finished a beer chugging contest Thursday afternoon with 133 members of Labor’s International Union Local No. 392 during a whistlestop in her “I Lift My Leg to Fart Tour” of middle America when Williams tracked her down at Shack’s Barbeque on Grant Street where she was trading belches with other diners and pretending to laugh.

With typical aplomb, Clinton answered every question Williams proffered with a reference to her credentials as America’s own White Power Candidate, the Aryan Shegod who can protect this battered nation’s White People and lead them to a new, safer and whiter future. Then her cell phone rang. As Williams started his next question, Clinton held up a hand and said, “Hold the line, Snuggybuns. It’s L’il Abner. Hope he hasn’t gotten his cigar caught someplace again” before turning to answer the phone with a loving greeting to her husband, Bill, “Hey, asshole, who you fucking this morning? Something that walks on two legs, I hope.”

Read the rest of this entry »

Yesterday was a great day for hilarious blogging, but I did nothing of the sort. Here’s a quick overview.

• Joe Biden calls them like he smells them. [Politico]
• California: soon to be the nation’s leader in gay divorce. [San Francisco Chronicle]
• John Conyers and his band of Merry Men on the Judiciary Committee are “closing in” on Karl Rove… not that they want to give the impression this is political or anything. [Politico]
• John McCain continues to to effectively run an insurgent campaign for president against himself. [Huffington Post]
• Report: New bin-Laden-Israel-birthday mix-tape ready to drop. [AP]
• House GOP tries to pass war off the Democrats. Both parties manage to accomplish nothing. Well done all around. [OpenLeft]

Been meaning to put this up for a couple days … if only I was a full-time blogger. Yeah - like Sallie Mae would permit that. Anyway:

Rep. Ron Paul is still in the GOP race and even drew 16% of the vote in the recent Pennsylvania Republican primary. Now his supporters are planning to stage a “revolt” at the Republican National Convention in September, possibly with the aim of securing Paul a prime time speaking slot.

Conservative radio talk show host Mike Gallagher told the hosts of Fox and Friends on Tuesday, “There is no question that this could be a major headache for John McCain.”

Doesn’t this make you love Paultards even more? Anything to knock the Psychogeezer™ off his stride. And, as John Cole pointed out, he’s got another problem - one Bob Barr:

And while I cheer this chiefly for the mayhem, the simple fact of the matter is that either Ron Paul or Bob Barr would be better than John McCain. I am still pretty convinced that Bob Barr is batshit crazy, but at least he has been right on some pretty important issues, and right on some trivial ones as well.

Fun times ahead. Count on it. Libertarian chaos comes home to roost. The GOP’d better batten down the fucking hatches.

Throughout this interminable Democratic Primary people have been speculating about former Vice Presidential nominee John Edwards’ potential endorsement. Today, now that everyone agrees that it’s already over, Edwards has broken his silence and endorsed Barack Obama. At this point, watching these primaries drag on and on is about as engaging as watching paint dry. But I have a big soft spot for John Edwards. After the jump, let us remember him in better days with some choice videos of Edwards doing stuff that was actually interesting. Read the rest of this entry »