And, thus it begins. Megan, Hunter and Greg drink and dissect/mock the President’s State of the Union address (as soon as it starts, but we know you’re just waiting for the open thread). Since it’s not a Giuliani Administration, we’re figuring that we won’t get everyone too drunk if we recommend drinking every time he says September 11th? Who knows. Let’s just figure out if the spell check works on this thing.

8:38 PM me: Hello!Greg: hiHunter: Hello!Hunter: i am inside THE CNN ELECTION CENTERGreg: haha yeah..8:40 PM i am watching on c-spanHunter: they have a state of the union countdown clock!Greg: because i only have the internets.Hunter: barack obama says everyone should have internetsor health carei forgetMittt is here!8:41 PM He’s so freaking PresidentialHe gargles every evening with honeySECRET MORMON NECTARSme: I’m on MSNBC. David Gregory is not dancing.8:42 PM Hunter: i haven’t heard a thing mitt saidbecause his voice is so soothingi was lulled into complacencyGreg: ALL I CAN SEE IS BARRY OBAMA AND SOME WOMAN8:43 PM Barry just said something about wearing long johns.8:44 PM Hunter: Was Barack Obama just hugging Stephen Colbert?I’m so glad i have DVRGreg: seriously, this is like the Obama cam.ok ok now we’re switching to the hillary cam.8:45 PM Hunter: that was not Stephen ColbertGreg: CASE CLOSEDHunter: i should probably get my glasses8:46 PM all these old white peopleme: i am just drinkingand watching commercials8:47 PM Hunter: OH MY GODIT’S THE CABOT CHEDDAR CHEESE COMMERCIAL WITH LUIS GUZMAN!!!!8:48 PM Greg: Watching all this handshaking is reminding me of the time i met john edwards in 2005and i said to him, totally sincerely, “It’s a shame about that election.”it made him mad.he said, “Well, yeah.”8:49 PM SO THEN I PUNCHED HIM IN THE FACEHunter: hai have had the pleasureof personally yelling at both Chuck Schumer and Rudy Giuliani8:50 PM Greg: Why the fuck does it take 10 minutes to drive from the White House to the Capitol?Hunter: ewit’s cheneyGreg: look hillary has her purse with her.8:51 PM Hunter: She is all wearing redHunter: cause she found her voiceHunter: OH!OH!Shhh!Huckabee is on!Huckabee is orange and matches his orange tie8:52 PM Hunter: I don’t think he’s been tanning- it looks like a bronzer or sprayscenarioGreg: he has been taking advice from lou dobbs on the most effective orange tints.Hunter: Nancy Pelosi dresses much better than Hillary8:53 PM Greg: TOTALLY BONABLEAM I RIGHT?Hunter: when she was youngerperhapswell nonot perhapsDEFINITELYbut now, no8:54 PM Huckabee has like pink raccoon eyes on his orange tanGreg: THEY ARE FORMING A COMMITTEE TO MAKE SURE GEORGE DOES NOT GET LOST8:55 PM the escort committeefunny that david vitter isn’t on it.Hunter: SIX MINUTES AND TWENTY SECONDS TO GO8:56 PM me: This MSNBC coverage is as boring as the average pre-game show, which is why I hate watching sports on TV.Hunter: who’s anchorin’?did they bring out russert or is it the b-team?me: Chris Matthews and Keith. David Gregory was on a second ago.Hunter: B TEAM8:57 PM JR VARSITYGreg: oh man. i’m going to see if i can get that coverageme: Is John Roberts wearing makeup?8:58 PM Greg: i never noticed his enormous bald spot before.hahadid you hear peolsi just say, “that’s pretty dramatic isn’t it to see the justices?”SHE IS MOVEDHunter: I can’t hear pelosi8:59 PM Someone giftwrapped Laura BushGreg: she wears that number quite a bit.Hunter: OK guysI want to talk about Jenna Bush for a second9:00 PM you know the like girls gone wild porno memedrunken sorority whatnotI normally don’t dig thatme: She’s cute, I agree.Hunter: well noits more complex than thatshe has a total dadface9:01 PM Greg: yepHunter: so its likeif i’m doing filthy things on/to itthen im really expressing my feeling for this administrationme: Uhhhh. OK.9:02 PM Hunter: guysit’s been seven yearsi’m pissedGreg: SKELETOR IS HERE9:03 PM hey, who is the person that gets to be president if someone manages to blow this thing up?Hunter: thats a good questionwho’s running HUD?Greg: that asian lady.9:04 PM Hunter: Mike Bloombergbecause he’s TOTALLY NEAUTRALit’s like a do-over9:05 PM me: No, Elaine Chao’s at Labor. They just got a new Ag SecretaryAaaand, he’s arrives. Let’s counts the Dems.There’s Steny right behind Bush9:06 PM Hunter: that lady just got an autograph??!me: Like, I love how the Dems are falling all over themselves.Greg: hahahaHunter: Secret Service is PISSEDme: You mean, Senator Olympia Snowe of Maine. Yes.Hunter: shh!Greg: Can’t get close enough to Best President EverHunter: lol9:07 PM Greg: that was olympia that got that autograph?SHEILA JACKSON LEE JUST CALLED BUSH “MY BROTHER”did you hear that?Hunter: why does olympia snowe need the president’s autograph?Greg: did you fucking hear that?9:08 PM Aw, he brought Cheney and Nancy presents.and he’s got a glass of everclear up there with him.9:09 PM me: nice.9:10 PM Hunter: Wowthat joke there:“it’s fair to say we answered the call”in other words:9:11 PM me: He has to pee?Hunter: we bombed the shit of them- har dee har har9:12 PM “the most reliable guide for our country is the collected wisdom of ordinary citizens”like on American Idol!me: That’s a total laugh line9:13 PM Ooh, the growth package he agreed with Pelosi on, but not Reid.“I’M TALKING TO YOU, SENATOR REID!”9:14 PM Greg: GET EVERYONE THEIR $300 IMMEDIATELYme: Oh, Jesus. That’s to all the stupidThat’s straight out of the fiscal conservative handbook.Greg: Cut to Rangel when talking about taxes. Rangel chuckles. Cut back to Bush.9:15 PM i missed whatever that money orders check was.me: Oh, he just said that for all the libtards that don’t mind paying more taxes, go ahead, the rest of us don’t wanna.