Apparently Jenna Welch Bush has married Henry Chase Hager, a graduate student, former aide to Karl Rove, and son of a former Virginia lieutenant governor. One can only assume that they spent their wedding night attempting to procreate, which they will no doubt manage to do at some point. They will provide us with our next generation of rulers - mass-murdering, pasty-white, barely-intelligible conservatives that will somehow get elected to something in some red retard state, thus launching them on a trajectory to national office and continuation of George W. Bush’s war against all of us (especially brown people).

A tribute to Jenna after the jump.

Ah, the good old days, when all Jenna had to do was drink and try to remain upright. Remember the good old days?

June, 1997: [Texas governor] Bush signs law toughening penalties for underage drinkers.

December 31, 1997: Jenna Bush arrested on alcohol charge in Texas. Record is kept confidential as Jenna is 16 at the time, but her name appears in a Texas Alcoholic Beverage Commission database.

April 27, 2001: Jenna Bush arrested for possession of alcohol as a minor.

May 31, 2001: Jenna and Barbara Bush arrested trying to purchase alcohol as minors. This is Jenna’s 3rd arrest, but she avoids the three-strikes law her father signed 4 years earlier.

Yeah, Jenna likes to drink. Let’s hope she doesn’t give birth to a fetal-alcohol-syndrome fuckwit like her grandmother.

Ladies and gentlemen, the next generation of overlords is on the way!