“Dig,” Ralphie was telling his homies at the barbershop, “he’s not gangsta enough, you know what I’m saying? Nigga’s only half Bro, but he’s all Oreo. Ignores his peeps so he can do a Tiger on the white folks, all polite and shit. Yes sir, thank you sir, your daughter is very beautiful sir although I wouldn’t dream of pleasuring her with my enormous mandingo that puts your shriveled stem to shame, no sir.”

“True dat,” said the homies.

“Dude’s no Jesse,” said Ralphie. “If I was him, I’d drop the Stepin Fetchit jive and take it to the hood. Stop letting those crackers tell him his business.”

“Word,” said the homies. “You da man.”

Nader: Obama trying to ‘talk white’ [Rocky Mountain News]