It’s a “double-elimination” tournament. Don’t ask.

Delphos (Ohio) Herald

Leave it to yourgiftpro.com to ask the tough questions in this election. I’m guessing this is a picture of Reverend Al in his younger days, but I’m not too sure about my choice. All three of those guys look a lot alike. It’s so cool that I can win stuff and be mentally challenged at the same time.

Apparently, I’m not the only one who is stockpiling urine. Protesters in Denver are allegedly planning some scatological warfare.

Denver firefighters have learned of a house full of urine being stored to throw at police. An internal memo is warning first responders that disgusting acts are a significant concern.

Protesters in other cities have used urine and feces filled balloons to throw at police and there are concerns that could happen during the Democratic National Convention in Denver.

Do any of you people live in Denver? If so, we need to find that house!

[KJCT News]

TSA stormtroopers are running wild again - this time reportedly at the Chicago airports where these twisted dimwits ripped the pants off of a wheelchair-bound old man and groped a teenage amputee traveling with a choir.

One of the victims recalls a deranged TSA agent cackling, “I have power!” over and over again in wanton rapture as she orgasmed in twisted satisfaction while terrorizing him. Read the whole sick story at CBS2-Chicago’s web site.

CBS2-Chicago Bags TSA Nazis Run Wild

• “All hurricanes are acts of God, because God controls the heavens. I believe that New Orleans had a level of sin that was offensive to God, and they are — were recipients of the judgment of God for that.” (Fresh Air, 2006)
• “Slavery in America is returning to Cornerstone… Make plans to come and go home with a slave.” (”Slave sale” fundraiser in Cornerstone Church newsletter, 1996)

Read the rest of this entry »

Olds McCain is taking a break from complaining about the weather, his rheumatism, and the tricksy shifts in the world’s geography. Instead he’s bitching about the media’s “love affair” with Barry Obama. Some of his followers are also pissed that the liberal media are still liberal:

How can an antiwar candidate vote against the Bush Surge– a brave maneuver that saved the Middle East from catastrophe, the international community from economic turmoil, and America her reputation– then say he’d do it again after undeniable succes — and still get glowing remarks from the media?
What’s wrong with this picture?
Is it because he looks good in shades? What?

But maybe something else is going on, eh?
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Disgraced Republican gay-bashing attack dwarf and men’s room goblin Bob Allen is still guilty of begging a cop for a chance to suck his dick for $20 last year, as a state appeals court laughed hysterically at his pathetic attempt at an appeal of his solicitation conviction.

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I’m sorry I’m late, but Barack Obama’s opposition to offshore drilling made me miss a turn. This after I waited in line ten minutes for a frappamochamuthafucka, only to discover that Obama’s stance on parental responsibility prevented me from hitting the bank machine first.

Read the rest of this entry »

McCain on geography:

We have a lot of work to do and I’m afraid it’s a very hard struggle, particularly given the situation on the Iraq/Pakistan border.

This “situation” he speaks of is, of course, the existence of Iran and Afghanistan between Iraq and Pakistan.

[LA Times]

2002: “Saddam Hussein is the most significant threat to our national security, and we must take strong action to pry the poisons, toxins, and the plans for nuclear weapons out of his hands.”

2003: “This is a day to face facts. Saddam has weapons of mass destruction. That is a fact.”

2004: “A democracy such as ours can only go to war and win with the informed support of the people.”

2005: “It is time for us to set aside for now the arguments about why we got into Iraq so that we can work together on how we can get out best in victory and honor with the job done.”

2006: “I hope that the Prime Minister [Malaki] takes away from his visit here that the US will continue to back him in his fight to build a stable, secure, democratic and independent Iraq, but that success in that quest will not depend on us.”

2007: “Precisely because [the] United States did invade Iraq, we are more, not less, responsible for stopping the atrocities unfolding there now.”

2008: “The fact is that if Barack Obama’s policy on Iraq had been implemented, Barack Obama couldn’t go to Iraq today. It wouldn’t be safe.”

The Surge: Who Was Right? Lieberman and Bayh Square Off [Fox]