Jesus-crazed Republican US Representative and president-stalker Michelle Bachmann (R-MN) was apparently staging another State of the Union address sexual assault on Boy Fuhrer George W Bush. People who own or live near televisions may remember the bizarre attack on Bush last year at the SOTU when Bachmann grabbed Bush’s hand, spun him on his heels and launched her vast furry tongue down his throat. A new plot to be hatched at this year’s SOTU was thwarted by fast-thinking US Secret Service agents earlier this month, equipped with tranquilizer guns and psychics.

Read the rest of this entry »

Now that everyone’s obsessed with the Presidential races, Congress has more time to pass legislation that bothers their constituents without anybody noticing. Today, the Senate passed the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act modernization bill — the one Bush mentioned in his State of the Union that had to get done before the old extension expired. Democrats have been “fighting” with Bush to keep a provision out of the bill that would provide immunity to phone companies that complied with the illegal warrantless wiretapping program and are facing lawsuits. Well, now that no one is actually paying attention to what Congress does because they’re all Barry! The Hills is alive! McCain! Huckatheocracy!, the Senate passed its version of the legislation providing that self-same immunity by a 69 to 29 vote and they’re fully expecting/demanding that the House do the same really soon before the program expires and The Terrorists Win.

Read the rest of this entry »

Law & Order is famous for featuring storylines that are “ripped from the headlines,” so it was only a matter of time before everbody’s favorite cruising Senator ended up with his own episode. I’m kind of surprised this didn’t end up being a case for the Special Victims Unit though. In college, I used to watch SVU way too much. My friends and I played an Special Victims Unit drinking game where we’d take shots every time Ice-T came on in a stupid hat, or when Det. Stabler would lose his shit imagining somebody doing something bad to his little girls. Anyway, back to tonight’s episode. I saw the commercial, so I know all about it. It is entitled Political Animal. It’s going to be amazing. Read the rest of this entry »